The freedom is coming

“I will play Papa, I will be the Papa. Marietta will play mama, and all of you will be our children.”

The conditioning of sexuality stands firmly on its very deep roots. You are supposed to wait until you are of age, hopefully someone of the opposite sex will choose you. You will get married and once married you will have children, preferably many of them and in that order, you have cemented your place in society and the society will reward you with respect. Do not dare choose anything else please because lord forbids if you do, you are an outcast, not one of us.

Sexual freedom is a human right. It stems from basic yet fundamental right of the freedom to choose. In an ideal world it is as simple as that. You get to define sexuality as you wish, explore it as you may and experience it fully to your own heart’s desire. Unfortunately for most of us – the odd ones out , a lot of learning and unlearning still needs to happen on the grounds we live in to ensure that we attain true sexual freedom.

Sexual freedom in the essence of the word, means the freedom to be our true selves. Now tell me, who wouldn’t want that for themselves? Freedom means you are not repressed or restrained. It has always been popularised and condoned for sex to be seen as a sinful duty if done outside of the parameters and boundaries of marriage; heterosexual marriages at that.

“Who is the woman and who is the man in your relationship?”

This is a question a lot of people in queer relationships have had to endure ever since they could openly speak of their  relationships. Who exactly set the benchmark for what is normal and what isn’t?  Why can’t we do the shadow work to actually learn that everything works in its own dynamics and not exactly the ones we have accepted and grown to love.

While I fully agree that the preceding generations have done immensely dangerous and difficult work in ensuring that humans can be able to publicly express themselves as heterosexuals, lesbian, gay, bisexuals and queer, the generation Z is breaking all of the existing barriers and boundaries. They have re- defined sexual freedom in the most liberal ways. Can people just have sex because they want to, with whomever they would like to have sex with  as long as they are both consenting adults? Absolutely!

We must just do away with stigmatization and prejudice . We should learn to respect the choices others make as much as we would like them to respect our own choices. There is enough room for all of us to live freely and purposefully.

Sexual freedom is a human right and for every right ,there are responsibilities. We have the right to enjoy and explore our sexualities in whatever way we may wish, the responsibility to respect every one else’s choices and to never , in any way violate others in the quest to keep them within the margins of what we deem normal and acceptable.

While older generations may assume that we mean we want multiple sexual partners when we speak about sexual freedom (which is not wrong by the way) , what we actually mean we want is the freedom to be ourselves. To enjoy the pleasures of life without the fear of hate crimes and harsh judgements. I am hopeful that we will soon find our meeting balance where we will all prosper.

The strides may be slow but the freedom is coming.

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